4) Even Cowgirls Get the Blues

3) The Matrix Revolutions

2) Hard Ball

1) Sweet November

You know, I think this list is a testament to what I've been saying about Keanu for the past couple of years: Despite how bad he very often is in films, the movies themselves tend to rise above him.

I mean, he's had a 20-year career, and really, you've only got eight or nine serious contenders for his five worst flicks. That's not a bad ratio.

Some people may think I'm being too harsh on Feeling Minnesota and should instead reward the downward trajectory of Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey, but consider that even the original Bill & Ted was such a stupid notion that the fact that it was any good at all is kind of an accident; the sequel couldn't avoid it. On the other hand, Feeling Minnesota was trying to be a good movie, and a bad good movie is worse than a bad bad movie.

Cowgirls really sucks, no question. But Matrix Revolutions is about as bad as a part three gets, really, especially when you remember that at the time, most people even liked the second one. At least it set up a good end to the trilogy, which Revolutions failed in every way to deliver.

Hard Ball, which is a feel good Bad News Bears, is probably Keanu's worst performance since Paula Abdul's "Hush Hush" video, which is the worst acting I've ever seen. Even counting high school theatre. There are some notes the guy just can't hit, which leads us to...

Sweet November, one of the worst movies of 2001. 'Nuff said.