I'm so glad I misread the article on
Cinematical about
Brett Ratner's new company, the creatively named Brett Ratner Brands. At first
glance, I thought it was a cosmetics business. Turns out he's leaping from movie
making to consulting, although it'd be refreshing to see what he could do with
$200 million of foundation and blush; he sure as hell has trouble consistently
turning that kind of money into good films.
But just because he's getting into the consultancy game,
that doesn't mean he's turning his back on movies. I'm sorry to be the one who
had to break that to you.
Instead, Ratner appears to be attacking projects like
the craft services table, telling
Ad Age he might be working on a film
adaptation of the video game,
God of War. At least, that's what he hopes to do
after he shoots Miley Cyrus' first non-Hannah Montana music video. Perhaps
fittingly, the director most recently attached to the God of War project
was our
favorite spittoon, Uwe Boll.
Cinematical also reports that the screenplay for God of
War is finished and that
Djimon Hounsou is among those being considered for the
lead role, Kratos, a Greek soldier with a dark past who feels the Gods of
Olympus have
abandoned him. God of War has been named the greatest PS2 game ever by IGN, and
it won the 2005 Game of the Year award from the Academy of Interactive Arts and
Sciences. Clearly, someone should make a movie out of this, and just as clearly,
most people familiar with both parties would probably prefer that the someone in
question not be Brett Ratner.
Back to Ratner's other line of work for a minute...I
find this consultancy thing fascinating. Here's what he does: He takes existing
products and brand names and molds pop culture and entertainment references and
influences around them. So, apparently, there were these two Guitar Hero
commercials that aired during the final American Idol, meaning I TiVo'd right
past them. They're a take-off of the landmark scene in Risky Business starring
the two Davids.
"The goal is to create a 'Got Milk' kind of ad. The ad
that everybody wants to be in ... like the [Hewlett-Packard] hands or the iTunes celebrity playlist," says the Rat. His job, then is to take someone's great idea
(Guitar Hero, in this case) and someone else's great idea (The "Old Time Rock n'
Roll" scene) and make a commercial out of them. Am I missing something or is
that what an ad agency copywriter does? Either way, the ads grab your attention,
particularly if you're watching American Idol.
Activision CEO Bobby Kitock marvels at Ratner's
abilities. "His unusual skill is not only that his tentacles go deep into the
creative community, but he genetically gets and understands how to make money,"
gushes Kitock, adding, "Take the X-Men -- he understood how to create a
box-office blockbuster. The Mariah Carey video ["Touch My Body"] is the same
thing. ... He can build brands, sell brands and sell the art form."
That's right, because neither X-Men nor Mariah Carey
were established brands by the time Brett Ratner showed up. Ditto God of War, I guess.
God of War, while a good game, is mostly uh, violence? Lots of gratuitous violence. As much as I would like to see a movie, I cant even begin to see the story and know you would spend a fortune on special effects to create it all.
Wednesday, May 28, 2008 at 4:30PM 
I'm so glad I misread the article on
Cinematical about
Brett Ratner's new company, the creatively named Brett Ratner Brands. At first
glance, I thought it was a cosmetics business. Turns out he's leaping from movie
making to consulting, although it'd be refreshing to see what he could do with
$200 million of foundation and blush; he sure as hell has trouble consistently
turning that kind of money into good films.
But just because he's getting into the consultancy game,
that doesn't mean he's turning his back on movies. I'm sorry to be the one who
had to break that to you.
Instead, Ratner appears to be attacking projects like
the craft services table, telling
Ad Age he might be working on a film
adaptation of the video game,
God of War. At least, that's what he hopes to do
after he shoots Miley Cyrus' first non-Hannah Montana music video. Perhaps
fittingly, the director most recently attached to the God of War project
was our
favorite spittoon, Uwe Boll.
Reader Comments (2)
God of War, while a good game, is mostly uh, violence? Lots of gratuitous violence. As much as I would like to see a movie, I cant even begin to see the story and know you would spend a fortune on special effects to create it all.
please do your best about this one(GOD OF WAR)damn it,i love it and it is my favorite dream, if i could....GOD BLESS U...