Thursday
24Jul2008
The Horror! MTV Plans 'Rocky Horror' Remake
Thursday, July 24, 2008 at 1:30AM
I'm repeating myself to regular Big Picture readers, but if
you're new, here's how we address remakes: There are basically three categories
- Yes, No, and Why the Hell Not?
The remakes in the Yes category are either bad movies to
begin with, or elements about them are bad, or they've dropped out of the
contemporary lexicon and managed to work their way back into relevance. The No
category is self-evident; some movies you just don't touch, and the list of
reasons why can be very short or incredibly long, but in the final analysis, there's nothing to
be gained by doing it. The third category is tricky. For example, I don't see
anything wrong with remaking The Day the Earth Stood Still because it's almost
60 years old and contemporary audiences can't buy the "effects" in the original.
I don't even believe you can compare the two, frankly. Others feel very strongly
about not remaking that film.
I feel very strongly about not remaking
The Rocky Horror
Picture Show. Jesus Christ, why? The ultimate midnight camp movie
extravaganza...and you're going to, what, make it hip and now? This news does not make me shiver me with antici...pation. Clearly, the
suits who made that decision don't know anything about movie fans or, for that
matter, rock n' roll.
Who are those suits? Ironically enough, it's the brain
trust at MTV. Even weirder, Lou Adler, the odd-looking gentleman to Jack
Nicholson's left at Lakers games and an executive producer of the original film,
is teaming up with MTV and Fox on the remake. It's not the worst decision Lou
Adler's ever made, though; he did spawn Cisco Adler, after all.
The announcement,
covered by Variety, doesn't indicate
whether MTV will broadcast the remake or distribute it through their film
division, although Adler says, "I'd like to see it shown a year from this coming
Halloween, but that's up to MTV," which sounds a lot more like a television
movie than a feature film.
I'm just shaking my head over this, both out of confusion
and sadness. The very worst thing you can do to The Rocky Horror Movie Show is
make it more palatable to a wide audience. It's specifically made to be out of
the ordinary, and now Dr. Frank N. Furter will apply a new coat of make-up for
all the world to see. In fact, this may be the worst idea I've heard for a
remake since the rumor that Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez would re-do
Casablanca.
You know why you don't remake Rocky Horror? For the same
goddamn reason you don't remake Star Wars or Gone With the Wind: It's a
phenomenon completely unto itself, an event unlike any other in its original version, and you'll dirty it
up and tarnish it by performing such a disservice. Here's the thing: I don't
especially love Rocky Horror. I mean, it's fun once or twice, the music's easily
the best thing about it, and the acting and filmmaking is pretty low-grade on
the whole. But that's what makes it the movie it is.
I will make one suggestion: Vince Vaughn as Frank N. Furter.
Why? Simple: He's already remade Norman Bates, so it's best to keep these
remarkably boneheaded remakes from spreading throughout Hollywood. Quick,
someone call Anne Heche about playing Janet.
Colin Boyd | Permalink | in MTV, Musicals, Remakes, Rocky Horror | Print Article | Email Article | 31 Comments | Share Article
Reader Comments (31)
ur an idiot...and u probably know it
so jeep on keepin on
its not a remake
its more like a cover song electrified...people didnt like bob dylan when he went electric and how stupid do they feel now
adler doesnt ever make bad decisions
check his list of acomplishments and out it up agains urs blogger-dick
A remake would be a disaster.
P.S. Anyone who can say someone never makes bad decisions, is themselves an idiot. Everyone makes bad decisions, some more then others.
People still go to school, right?
Well played sir.
wow, MTV is going to destroy the Rock Horror Picture show, and yes it's true MTV makes kids stupid.
whats with the douche posting first? Colin man you're great. I hate that i don't get to hear you on the morning ritual anymore, Adam Carolla sucks, but i love the website. keep up the good work man
Wow, I love your thoughts on the matter. Especially the Vince Vaughn and Anne Heche idea.
Before the Clone Wars stuff, I had been secretly hoping that Star Wars would be re-made.
By PIXAR!
I thought they could do it right, making it a pleasant addition to the SW 'Verse, kinda like Lego Star Wars Video games are okay...
And since the Disney tradition is about retelling classic tales in a unique and artistic way, I don't think it would be total heresy...would it?
I think that anything featuring MeatLoaf, including the infamous Black Dog, and those sweet GoPhone commercials, should be untouchable...
So like Miss Brittney Spears, leave Rocky Horror alone!
Star Wars cannot be remade...it can only be ho-maged!
I agree with you completly. To remake this movie would be ridiculous. I happen to be one of the few who absolutely love this movie and to destroy it or taint it with MTV is a horrible idea. It's like what you said, "You know why you don't remake Rocky Horror? For the same goddamn reason you don't remake Star Wars or Gone With the Wind: It's a phenomenon completely unto itself, an event unlike any other in its original version, and you'll dirty it up and tarnish it by performing such a disservice." That's exactly why they shouldn't remake it.
Can we get Panic at the Disco attached? That might be the only way to pull off the musical theatrical elements, and honestly it really wouldn't be a far stretch for them. And it be the only way to pull the stupid MTV crowd into buying the idea.
LOVE ROCKY HORROR!!!!! Please do not remake this movie. Tim Curry could NEVER
be replaced. Let this generation find their own cult classic. Leave mine alone.
Remake "Rocky Horror"?...I mean come on! This whole "remake" kick Hollywood is on has gone on far enough. Have they ran completely out of ideas that they have to go and re-do something that doesn't need re-doing? Every remake they have done, with the exception of of a select few, has been an absolute mess. But to mess with "Rocky Horror" is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard!...Ruin yet another classic. They need to leave the good stuff alone and actually "think" up new ideas. Writers and producers have gotten far too lazy to come up with anything new or original so they think of a way to make a quick buck and ruin a classic.
Holy Hell, I think I just developed cancer from the idea of a remake. What an awful though! MTV has reputation to crap on everything and I honestly believe that this will be one of their biggest dumps ever. Hollywood has ran out of things to do, yes... it's all down hill from here, folks.
Classics are called classics for a reason. It was fine the way it was... Don't get prostitot stars and forgotten has beens to redo this!... Leave it ALOOOOONE!
I can't begin to say how horrified I am... what's a good word for it?
Horrificallyterrifrantic... that will suffice for now.
*ugh*
I think the worst part about this is that if it is a success among those who have not seen the original (and I mean, have you SEEN the crap teenagers go for lately? They'll like anything!) they may start to claim that they are Rocky Horror fans, to the disgust of those of us who are fans of the REAL Rocky Horror Picture Show. You can't replace this movie!!! Anything they do to it will just completely ruin it.
Can any one be original anymore. Like for real we do not need anymore remade movies i have grown up with RHPS and MTV will not do it any good.
why the hell would you want to get panic! at the disco involved? yeah their concerts are very theatrical, but seriously, they don't fit the rock and roll image that meatloaf provided in the first (and only true) movie.
i'm with the diehard fans. LEAVE ROCKY HORROR THE FUCK ALONE.
No!
Putting my foot down! (even though it is a very small foot to the big people)
In my re-written words of Chris Crocker - leave rocky horror ALONE :'(
But if they have to..
Anthony Head?
Rocky Horror is an amazing movie. They should leave it alone. Hollywood has gone to far with this. I didn't care for most of the remakes they made. I liked some because some were good. But I don't believe they should re-make something that has nothing wrong with it. It's an amazing movie. No one can replace Tim Curry or any of the cast. Especially since Tim Curry was the one and only Frank-N-Furter. So why try to ruin it like that. It's completely unbeleivable. Why would Richard O'Brien let them do this?
I'm 16 and adore Rocky Horror, but what makes it great is completely lost upon my generation. By marketing it to a mass audience(and losing what makes it great), MTV will also ruin the Rocky Horror Culture. The midnight showings will be tarnished by 12 year virgins with their moms getting all offended. The faux fans will ruin it for us true fans who love nothing more than to dress in drag, do the time warp(again) and go out to an all night diner afterwards.
Please MTV, you screw up alot, but you can still stop this
DON'T DO IT!!!!
To the guy who mde the remark about MTV crapping on everything good,
I agree. This will completely block the fucking toilet!
These MTV idiots SHOULD try and come up with something original and not play around with something so unique as the rocky horror show. They'll only screw it up because it was like nothing anybody had seen before. But Richard O' Brien surely can stop this happening. After all, he wrote the whole thing and should have the rights to stop it. I don't know why he's letting it happen.
When MTV come up with original things by themselves, some of it is good. Look at FurTV. That was genius comedy. Almost all the other programmes are cheesy, stupid, 'black people date black people, white people date white people only' crap.
The desperation is so obvious that it actually makes me cringe!
NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! They can't redo this movie! I love it just the way it is, it's the perfect cult movie! If they remake this, it will completely ruin what this movie is. You can't make it any better than it already is, it is what it is supposed to be.
I love how you are all saying that this is an incredible movie. Seriously, without the audience participation and the songs, the original movie would be complete crap as well. The only reason it still remains popular is because of us die hard fans that go to the midnight showings dressed in drag. Most likely the MTV version will flop because it is a stupid movie anyway and the popular masses won't get it. Please don't get me wrong, I LOVE RHPS, but because I am one of those few that find odd things attractive and Super Heros is the best song ever.