Sunday, August 31, 2008 at 10:53AM
After sitting through over six years of awful movies, never moving from my stance that Swept Away was the worst I'd seen in years, I changed my tune this week. You see, I saw Disaster Movie. There had been many contenders, some unprofessionally made garbage, others completely misguided major studio fare, but neither Gigli nor Catwoman nor Pluto Nash nor Son of the Mask nor The Love Guru could reach the highest of lows. There is something different about Disaster Movie, which appears to purposely avoid being funny or perhaps more accurately, appears to purposely choose to be unfunny. There's no story, no good performances, no imagination, just a downpour of bad celebrity impressions - all of which have to be introduced to the audience - and the occasional nod to a disaster movie, which never amounts to anything. Finally, I had a new answer to the question, "What's the worst movie you've ever seen?" I can't count Freddy Got Fingered, because I walked out, the only time in my career I've made that statement. Outside of that possibility, I can say that in the past decade of reviewing movies, nothing I've seen touches Disaster Movie. And now IMDB voters are backing me up. The movie soared to the number one position on the Bottom 100 list on its opening weekend, surpassing the likes of Who's Your Caddy, Zombie Nation, and previous title holder, Ben & Arthur, whatever that is. Not counting my yet-to-be-cast vote of zero stars, Disaster Movie currently has an IMDB ranking of 1.3, which is fairly generous. Here's a look at the revised top ten:
Let's keep it in its rightful place; if you've got an
IMDB account, vote with your heart. I'd never ask you to manipulate your vote,
but if you've seen it and if you thought a 1.3 is being too kind, let 'em know.