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'Die Hard' at the White House Projects Makes Me Wish Die Hard Was Never Made

I love Die Hard.  I’ve seen it so many times.  I’ll even watch it on AMC in its miserable edited glory.  It was the perfect combination of the average guy as the hero, action, story and humor.  What I didn’t like about Die Hard was the endless parade of Die Hard on a….type stories that were thrust down our throats (e.g.: No Contest with Andrew Dice Clay and Shannon TweedDie Hard at a Beauty Contest...seriously).  Well it looks like the formula is coming back with not one, but two projects; both set at the White House….shoot me now.

Antoine Fuqua, who’s  only had one good movie to his credit (Training Day) and Roland Emmerich, who’s only had two halfway decent movies to his credit (The Patriot and Universal Soldier),  have been given to glorious task of resurrecting the all to played out Die Hard on a…genre. 

Antoine’s film:  Olympus Has Fallen will deal with a Secret Service agent who has to save the president.  That project has the poor mans Bruce Willis, Gerald Butler, attached to star…I’m guessing as the Secret Service agent, call it a hunch.  Roland’s project: White House Down, while not much is known about the story, will probably follow a similar path and will hopefully not include aliens or an end of the world type scenario.

I think at this point I’d rather just see a Die Hard remake.  Or maybe I’ll make a long term goal to build a time machine, go back to 1987, and convince Steven E. De Souza not to write Die Hard.  Its hurts to say something like that, but I don’t think I can take these types of movies anymore.  I guess it’s only a matter of time before we see Die Hard on a…escalator.  

Go ahead; Nu Image/Millenium (the company behind Olympus) and Sony (White House Down) make your movies… I’m out.  I’ll be hanging out at home, watching this sure to be better film.  Yippee Ki Yay Mother F**ker.  No need to thank me for turning you on to this...

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