Uh...What? Oldman the Dwarf in 'Tiptoes'?

I had the hardest time believing this was real. But as it turns out, there was a romantic comedy about six years ago called Tiptoes. It starred Matthew McConaughey, Kate Beckinsale, Gary Oldman, Patricia Arquette, and Peter Dinklage. I never heard of it until earlier this afternoon.

It was never released in the U.S. theatrically, popping up on DVD in August 2004, but I'm still surprised the subject of Tiptoes never came up. You see, not only does it look for all the world like one of the worst movies ever made...it's about dwarves. And Gary Oldman is one of the little people. I'll leave it at that. Watch the trailer and chart your emotions:

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Movie Review - 'The Ghosts of Girlfriends Past'

The Ghosts of Girlfriends Past Starring Matthew McConaughey, Jennifer Garner, and Michael Douglas Directed by Mark Waters Rated PG-13

You have wondered how a movie got made. Not from a technical standpoint, but how the idea you're watching unfold ever made it through the proper channels. Ghosts of Girlfriends Past answers that question pretty early on. I can imagine a producer looking at the one-page treatment of the film, a summary that says, "It's A Christmas Carol substituting Scrooge with a womanizer. He's confronted by the way he uses and discards women while being reminded that he's had true love within his reach his entire life." The producer throws a face onto the treatment - Matthew McConaughey - and begins reading the script. Connor Mead is a photographer, and a damn good one. After shooting a gorgeous singer for an upcoming magazine cover, he takes her into his office for a little...uh...extra exposure. Before he can sleep with the singer, he has to break up with three other girls via conference call. The producer is hooked. Nothing that happens after the conference call break-up really matters. The treatment already put that modern spin on the Charles Dickens classic, the producer loves the McConaughey idea, and just think of how good that break-up will look in the TV commercials. This movie is getting made! The problem is that Ghosts of Girlfriends Past wastes the central idea, which is a good enough one, and the conference call is maybe six minutes into the movie. Good luck wading through the rest of it; it doesn't improve much.

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Keep Your Shirt On: McConaughey Won't Play Captain America

 We didn't bother to report in this story a couple of weeks ago because we didn't feel there was any justification for it in the first place, and now, we're happy to announce that Matthew McConaughey will not play Captain America. IESB recently sat down with Marvel's Kevin Feige, who revealed that those rumors were absolutely false.

A little more is known about Captain America, as well. For example, yes, that was the Captain's shield in Tony Stark's bad-ass garage, seen briefly when he takes off the Iron Man suit. What does it mean? Nothing, apparently. Just a tip of the cap, that's all. It's like E.T. making an appearance in the second Star Wars trilogy when Padme addresses the galactic council. But as for the shield being a thread that ties two movies together, don't bet on it. Another confirmation Fiege was able to make was that Captain America will be a period piece. That's actually a backflip-worthy development. Not to rehash the entire story for you now, but we made the case that one of the reasons Superman Begins was not as big as anybody wanted it to be was that as a superhero, audiences have a harder time relating to the "Man of Steel" concept in today's climate. They like flawed humans thrown in extraordinary situations now. It could shift back, but for the time being, audiences like complicated figures with tremendous weaknesses. Superman doesn't have tremendous weaknesses. Just a theory.

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